Chapter 18

I told him about what my mum said.
It frightened him too.
'So... you want to b-break up?' he asked me, making me feel guilty.
'NOOO!' I was so terrified by the idea, I didn't even notice that I yelled my answer.

He sighed in relief, but I could still see panic in his eyes.
'Then what are we going to do? '
'Easy. We're going to date secretly.' The idea didn't seem so dificult. I was actually secretly dating with him right now.
'Oh,' he sounded unsure.
'What is it?'
'I should have expected such an idea from you,' he told me and we both laughed.
Too bad, this couldn't last forever.
I soon had to go, my mum was going to worry if I'd be late for dinner.
Austin gave me a little kiss on the lips and a big hug. He waved me goodbye and I got my way home.


'Where did you go, honey?'my mum asked me.
'Oh,' it took me a second to think of a lie. 'I went to Emily's house to bring her the blouse I borrowed from her,' yeah.. that was good.
'Fine,' she sounded like she knew I lied.

Dinner passed by quickly. My oh so called "sister" was talking to my mum about some people from her school of hers. Gossip actually. I ate my soup quietly, then cleaned my plate.
I went upstairs, to my room.
I opened my iPod and started to listen to a song. It was 'When she cries' by Britt Nicole.
The lyrics reminded me of what happened before I met Austin.
I started to sing along.
Then I felt like crying, even though I didn't have any reason that should make me cry.
Well there were a few, but they didn't matter to me so much.
I fell asleep quickly, expecting the next day.

A new day..

Chapter 17

When I got home, I went to the kitchen where I knew mum would be. She was cutting some herbs on the chopping board.
'Oh hey Claudia! Anything wrong? Seems like you've ran all the way home,' she said, concerned.
'Mum... Uhm I've got a boyfriend,' I blurted out. She stopped what she was doing, turned around to look at at me. I could tell she was thinking what to say. At last she said:
'What's his name?' she asked, like it was totally normal.
'He's Austin', I felt butterflies in my stomach when I said his name.
'Oh, Mrs Robson's son, right? I heard he is a nice boy but...' she stopped at the last word.
'But what?',what could possibly be wrong about him?
'Darling I know you love him but the mistake I made, you'll do the same,' she explained. I didn't know what to say. I stomped upstairs to my bedroom. But I couldn't get any privacy there as Cindy was there. I tried fighting back the tears.

She looked up at me. And smirked. I swear one day I'll do something to her that I will never regret.
'Don't f*cking say anything,' I warned. I turned around and wiped a tear that escaped. She chuckled. I felt the surge of anger.
'Heh', she came to me and wispered:' I always win, sis'.

Sis.

Ugh, sisters aren't like that.
I didn't want her around me.
I ran downstairs and slammed the door.

Austin was right where we always meet up. I ran into his arms. And let out a huge sob.
'What happened, sweety?' ,his innocent voice asked me.
I looked in his eyes and a part of the saddness was gone. Soon enough, I wasn't going to enjoy his intense green eyes anymore.
I sobbed again. I hid my face in his shirt.
I wasn't going to live without him.

Chapter 16

It's been a while sence me and Austin have been dating.
Every day is better that the previous.
And he's such a perfect guy.. so undersanding, so gorgeous, so intelligent, so funny, so perfect for me!


Monday morning, I was happy to go to school because I'd see him.
Cindy and I had to go together because I was the older one and I have to protect her and Callum.
Thank God, she isn't at the same school where I am, but her school is pretty close to mine, so that's not so good.
As I walked with her to the school gates, I saw Austin coming from the corner.
Nobody in my family knew I had a boyfriend. I was afraid that if I'd tell my mum or dad, they wouldn't allow me to see him again. Only my friends knew. Now I understood why they all loved spending time with them and they enjoyed talking about them.
Very addicting. It was different with Zack. He pretty much didn't care about me so it wasn't such a big difference if I was his girlfriend or not.
As I let Cindy enter the school, I felt someone grabbing my hand, making me turn around.
He kissed me that wonderful kiss that made me forget to breathe.
'Hey, beautiful', he greeded me.
'Hey, handsome', I replayed, enjoying his game.
We went to school holding hands. I didn't care if the world was going to crash. I cherished every moment with him. He was everyting for me.

After school ended, he hugged me and gave me a kiss on the forhead.

What I didn't know was that Cindy saw us.

On our way home she asked me :
'So, what's his name?' her voice sounded evil.
'What are you talking about?' I asked her.
'You know what I mean, the guy you kissed's name'
'Huh? How.. Wha-'
'And I'm going to tell mum', she said with a smirk.
'If you do I swear I will..'
'You will what? You can't do anything, I have dad and mum on my side' she said, sticking her tongue out.

So I had nothing to do.
I hoped mum wasn't going to kill me.

Chapter 15

A few days have passed now.
Surprisingly,dad changed.
Fortunatly, in good. Dad realised his problems and tried solving them. First one his list was drinking. He cut down, now he rarely goes out drinking. This week me and Callum are with dad.
At court they decided that we have a week at each parent to make it fair.
I like being with mom, too. Her boyfriend seems a cool guy. But my little step sister is really annoying. I always hoped for a little sister, that would be nice and kind. But nooooo, I had to stick with this spoiled brat named Cindy.

Me and Callum go to the same school we did before the divorce. My friends have tried helping me. They have also noticed that they should have spent time with me and they apologized. Brenda's not with her boyfriend anymore, Emily's relationship isn't so great and Izzy's boyfriend is great. We help each other out more now. Austin and I have become more closer. I knew about his family; he had an older brother, in college and a little sister same age as Callum. His parents were also divorced which was the secret to why he could understand me. My best friends have said that Austin likes me but I'm not so sure. I'm not really that beautiful enough to be his girlfriend or anything.

After school that day, me and Austin were out together. As friends only though. We had been to a cafe and book shop, as he loved books like me. When we stepped out it started to rain. I groaned. Austin grinned.
'What's the matter Claudia? Don't like rain now?'
'Well sort of, I hate getting wet,' I explained. He stepped out onto the road, leaving his bag on the step outside the book shop.
'Ohh c'mon.. It's not that bad! Hey, let's dance!' and he pulled me out. Austin looked amazing. Even with wet hair he looked handsome. We started dancing in the rain.

I stopped and laughed at us being silly. So did he. But then we stopped laughing and just looked at each other.
He took my hand and pulled closer till my lips crushed his. I was the most amazing kiss I ever had. All these fireworks set off in my stomach. Austin's lips were so soft and I just melted into them. We came apart. It was so perfect.
We were made for eachother.

'I love you Austin,' I murmured. He glanced at me.
'I love you too Claudia,' and pulled me in again. Yet this time we kissed for longer. We slowly parted our lips and both our tongues touched. I felt like as if I was flying.
Once again we came apart, he looked at me blushing.
'Erm.. Claudia? Do you.. Uhm.. Do you want to go out?'

I smiled.

I nodded.

I kissed him.

Chapter 14

I sat there, staring at the ceiling.
Later, I herd some more shouting downstairs. I covered my ears and closed my eyes to stop the cruel reality. I fell asleep.
Next morning, I got up and hoped my parents would be at least calm. When I got in the kitchen, I saw there just Callum.
'She's gone', he said simply. I knew what he ment. Mum moved house.
'What about dad?', I asked him, even tho I didn't really care.
'At work', he told me.
I felt bad for both of them.
For Callum because he deserved much better. He was a nice boy, that loved everything around him, until the two most precious things in the world broke. His youthful happiness... all destroyed and put up with unforgivable sorrows.
And for dad because a simple mistake ruined all his life. The miracle of birth didn't make him happy. He didn't want me. He didn't want me to be born. To exist. To be his responsability.

I ran to Austin. I was glad I had him. Such an understanding person, such a beautiful figure.
After I told him about my mum he hugged my tightly.
It felt nice.
You didn't have the need to break the silence. It was a perfect moment.
Quiet and nice.
'Sooner or later, things will get better, I promise', he told me with a sincere smile.
It reminded me of the promise I made to my brother.
I broke it.
'Don't promise. I don't want you to break your promises', I told him, looking down.
'I'm sure this one is going to happen', he said with his melodic voice.
Then I saw Zack, watching us, still hugging. Well actually, he was stalking.
I smirked.

He was jelaous of us. The corners of my lips curved up, with pleasure.
He missed me.
I wanted to make him suffer.
I kissed Austin on his cheek.
'Thanks for your enormous help, Austin', I said, with a little shade of blush on my cheeks.
'Y-You're welcome', he said, while blushing with hundred of shades.
I could feel Zack's eyes on me. Hah, he can miss me as much as he can, I'm not taking him back.

Chapter 13

Next morning at school I saw Austin leaning againest a wall, listening to his mp3 player. He noticed me and waved me over. As I approached him he took his right earphone out and smiled. His teeth were pearly white. So perfect.
'Hey Claudia.'
'You remembered my name?' I teased him. Austin laughed.
'Yeah,' he stuck his tongue out at me, making him look real ctue. 'Hopefully you still remember my name.'
'In fact I do so ha!' it was my turn to stick my tongue out. Austin laughed.
'Aww you look so cute when you do that,' he complimented. I blushed. 'Anyway any more problems I can listen to?' and that was how I started telling him about Callum crying and dad slapping me. He listened all through, like last time. Austin didn't even flinch at any of th things I said. I felt like an open book and damn did it feel good. I wished I could stay forever with him, just talking about random things but the bell rang. Time for classes.

Mum came into my bedroom. She sat down. I looked up at her, she looked better than yesterday morning. She had that look that meant she had something serious to talk to me about. Like when she talked about sex to me for the first time. And puberty. And periods.
'Claudia, I've got something to tell you,' she breathed in deep, 'I'm moving out. I've got boyfriend called Alexander. He's got a daughter, a year younger than you called Cindy. Hopefully after the divorce you'll be able to share with her and live with us.' I rarely heard what she said. It all came out as one sentence. I stopped listening. I couldn't believe she's got a boyfriend. She carried on talking but I didn't hear a sound.
I had gone all numb.
'B-b-but why did you and dad marry each other if you didn't love each other? Now me and Callum are going to be scarred for life!' I asked her. She looked at me and sighed.
'Me and your dad.. Well I had this sort of one night stand with him. He was a friend of mine and we had it, you know what I mean. The condom cracked and we didn't know. Weeks after I found out I was pregnant and we wanted what was best for you. So we got married so you'd have a wonderful life. But we di-' I cut her off.
'But my life hasn't turned out lovely has it? It's all broken now because of both of you. You don't know how much it hurts to see your parents break up!' I shouted. By now tears were streming down my face. They just kept on coming.
'You.. You don't know my life. You don't know my problems. You don't know me mum. And don't give me the stupid "it'll be alright" cos this family is never going to be alright again!' I got up and stared out the window. I didn't have enough courage to look at her face. She came up to me and tried to hug me, I pushed her away. A few minutes later, the door was closed.

I turned around, fell to the floor and sobbed my heart out.

Chapter 12

A masive hand slapped my cheek, which was blushing from thinking of Austin. I couldn't manage to say anything. Pain ran through all my body. Suddenly I was very scared. I prayed dad wouldn't beat me like he did with mum.
'How could you, young lady?' he screamed at me.
'W-wha-what did I do?' my voice sounded as if I was going to cry.
'You failed the history test! You're making me and your mum ashamed of you! We're not doing anything bad to you! We feed you and spend money on you. And this is our recompense? Bad marks?' his cold voice yelled at me.

I wanted to tell him how bad I was feeling. If it was after me, I wouldn't eat a month if they'd get back together and be a happy family. I would work and get a job if that would resolve the family problems. But I shut my mouth. I knew it wouldn't help at all.
I kept my tears for tonight. I could feel another fight was going to happen.
When I went up the stairs, I herd a crying noise from my brothers room.

'Why are you crying, Callum?' I asked him, while wipping a tear from his cheek.
'Y-you pro-promised', he said, with a breaking voice.
My world went down again. I broke my promise.
I couldn't do anything about it.Oh, I wished I could..
'S-sorry...' , it was all I could say.
'Dad told me he and mom are divorcing' he said. I could feel the saddness in his voice.
'I..I..' , I didn't know what to say.
'It'll be alright, Callum. You don't have to worry about it. ' , I lied again. Why did I have to say that?
I went in my room and jumped in my bed. I wanted to cry.

I did.

Questions were floating in my mind again.
They were all staring with 'why'.
Why can't my mum and dad get along?
Why can't my dad stop being so violent?
Why can't they do this for me and Callum?
Why can't we be a happy family?
Why...