Wednesday, 22 April 2009

Chapter 18

I told him about what my mum said.
It frightened him too.
'So... you want to b-break up?' he asked me, making me feel guilty.
'NOOO!' I was so terrified by the idea, I didn't even notice that I yelled my answer.

He sighed in relief, but I could still see panic in his eyes.
'Then what are we going to do? '
'Easy. We're going to date secretly.' The idea didn't seem so dificult. I was actually secretly dating with him right now.
'Oh,' he sounded unsure.
'What is it?'
'I should have expected such an idea from you,' he told me and we both laughed.
Too bad, this couldn't last forever.
I soon had to go, my mum was going to worry if I'd be late for dinner.
Austin gave me a little kiss on the lips and a big hug. He waved me goodbye and I got my way home.

'Where did you go, honey?'my mum asked me.
'Oh,' it took me a second to think of a lie. 'I went to Emily's house to bring her the blouse I borrowed from her,' yeah.. that was good.
'Fine,' she sounded like she knew I lied.

Dinner passed by quickly. My oh so called "sister" was talking to my mum about some people from her school of hers. Gossip actually. I ate my soup quietly, then cleaned my plate.
I went upstairs, to my room.
I opened my iPod and started to listen to a song. It was 'When she cries' by Britt Nicole.
The lyrics reminded me of what happened before I met Austin.
I started to sing along.
Then I felt like crying, even though I didn't have any reason that should make me cry.
Well there were a few, but they didn't matter to me so much.
I fell asleep quickly, expecting the next day.

A new day..

Monday, 13 April 2009

Chapter 17

When I got home, I went to the kitchen where I knew mum would be. She was cutting some herbs on the chopping board.
'Oh hey Claudia! Anything wrong? Seems like you've ran all the way home,' she said, concerned.
'Mum... Uhm I've got a boyfriend,' I blurted out. She stopped what she was doing, turned around to look at at me. I could tell she was thinking what to say. At last she said:
'What's his name?' she asked, like it was totally normal.
'He's Austin', I felt butterflies in my stomach when I said his name.
'Oh, Mrs Robson's son, right? I heard he is a nice boy but...' she stopped at the last word.
'But what?',what could possibly be wrong about him?
'Darling I know you love him but the mistake I made, you'll do the same,' she explained. I didn't know what to say. I stomped upstairs to my bedroom. But I couldn't get any privacy there as Cindy was there. I tried fighting back the tears.

She looked up at me. And smirked. I swear one day I'll do something to her that I will never regret.
'Don't f*cking say anything,' I warned. I turned around and wiped a tear that escaped. She chuckled. I felt the surge of anger.
'Heh', she came to me and wispered:' I always win, sis'.


Ugh, sisters aren't like that.
I didn't want her around me.
I ran downstairs and slammed the door.

Austin was right where we always meet up. I ran into his arms. And let out a huge sob.
'What happened, sweety?' ,his innocent voice asked me.
I looked in his eyes and a part of the saddness was gone. Soon enough, I wasn't going to enjoy his intense green eyes anymore.
I sobbed again. I hid my face in his shirt.
I wasn't going to live without him.

Chapter 16

It's been a while sence me and Austin have been dating.
Every day is better that the previous.
And he's such a perfect guy.. so undersanding, so gorgeous, so intelligent, so funny, so perfect for me!

Monday morning, I was happy to go to school because I'd see him.
Cindy and I had to go together because I was the older one and I have to protect her and Callum.
Thank God, she isn't at the same school where I am, but her school is pretty close to mine, so that's not so good.
As I walked with her to the school gates, I saw Austin coming from the corner.
Nobody in my family knew I had a boyfriend. I was afraid that if I'd tell my mum or dad, they wouldn't allow me to see him again. Only my friends knew. Now I understood why they all loved spending time with them and they enjoyed talking about them.
Very addicting. It was different with Zack. He pretty much didn't care about me so it wasn't such a big difference if I was his girlfriend or not.
As I let Cindy enter the school, I felt someone grabbing my hand, making me turn around.
He kissed me that wonderful kiss that made me forget to breathe.
'Hey, beautiful', he greeded me.
'Hey, handsome', I replayed, enjoying his game.
We went to school holding hands. I didn't care if the world was going to crash. I cherished every moment with him. He was everyting for me.

After school ended, he hugged me and gave me a kiss on the forhead.

What I didn't know was that Cindy saw us.

On our way home she asked me :
'So, what's his name?' her voice sounded evil.
'What are you talking about?' I asked her.
'You know what I mean, the guy you kissed's name'
'Huh? How.. Wha-'
'And I'm going to tell mum', she said with a smirk.
'If you do I swear I will..'
'You will what? You can't do anything, I have dad and mum on my side' she said, sticking her tongue out.

So I had nothing to do.
I hoped mum wasn't going to kill me.

Chapter 15

A few days have passed now.
Surprisingly,dad changed.
Fortunatly, in good. Dad realised his problems and tried solving them. First one his list was drinking. He cut down, now he rarely goes out drinking. This week me and Callum are with dad.
At court they decided that we have a week at each parent to make it fair.
I like being with mom, too. Her boyfriend seems a cool guy. But my little step sister is really annoying. I always hoped for a little sister, that would be nice and kind. But nooooo, I had to stick with this spoiled brat named Cindy.

Me and Callum go to the same school we did before the divorce. My friends have tried helping me. They have also noticed that they should have spent time with me and they apologized. Brenda's not with her boyfriend anymore, Emily's relationship isn't so great and Izzy's boyfriend is great. We help each other out more now. Austin and I have become more closer. I knew about his family; he had an older brother, in college and a little sister same age as Callum. His parents were also divorced which was the secret to why he could understand me. My best friends have said that Austin likes me but I'm not so sure. I'm not really that beautiful enough to be his girlfriend or anything.

After school that day, me and Austin were out together. As friends only though. We had been to a cafe and book shop, as he loved books like me. When we stepped out it started to rain. I groaned. Austin grinned.
'What's the matter Claudia? Don't like rain now?'
'Well sort of, I hate getting wet,' I explained. He stepped out onto the road, leaving his bag on the step outside the book shop.
'Ohh c'mon.. It's not that bad! Hey, let's dance!' and he pulled me out. Austin looked amazing. Even with wet hair he looked handsome. We started dancing in the rain.

I stopped and laughed at us being silly. So did he. But then we stopped laughing and just looked at each other.
He took my hand and pulled closer till my lips crushed his. I was the most amazing kiss I ever had. All these fireworks set off in my stomach. Austin's lips were so soft and I just melted into them. We came apart. It was so perfect.
We were made for eachother.

'I love you Austin,' I murmured. He glanced at me.
'I love you too Claudia,' and pulled me in again. Yet this time we kissed for longer. We slowly parted our lips and both our tongues touched. I felt like as if I was flying.
Once again we came apart, he looked at me blushing.
'Erm.. Claudia? Do you.. Uhm.. Do you want to go out?'

I smiled.

I nodded.

I kissed him.

Chapter 14

I sat there, staring at the ceiling.
Later, I herd some more shouting downstairs. I covered my ears and closed my eyes to stop the cruel reality. I fell asleep.
Next morning, I got up and hoped my parents would be at least calm. When I got in the kitchen, I saw there just Callum.
'She's gone', he said simply. I knew what he ment. Mum moved house.
'What about dad?', I asked him, even tho I didn't really care.
'At work', he told me.
I felt bad for both of them.
For Callum because he deserved much better. He was a nice boy, that loved everything around him, until the two most precious things in the world broke. His youthful happiness... all destroyed and put up with unforgivable sorrows.
And for dad because a simple mistake ruined all his life. The miracle of birth didn't make him happy. He didn't want me. He didn't want me to be born. To exist. To be his responsability.

I ran to Austin. I was glad I had him. Such an understanding person, such a beautiful figure.
After I told him about my mum he hugged my tightly.
It felt nice.
You didn't have the need to break the silence. It was a perfect moment.
Quiet and nice.
'Sooner or later, things will get better, I promise', he told me with a sincere smile.
It reminded me of the promise I made to my brother.
I broke it.
'Don't promise. I don't want you to break your promises', I told him, looking down.
'I'm sure this one is going to happen', he said with his melodic voice.
Then I saw Zack, watching us, still hugging. Well actually, he was stalking.
I smirked.

He was jelaous of us. The corners of my lips curved up, with pleasure.
He missed me.
I wanted to make him suffer.
I kissed Austin on his cheek.
'Thanks for your enormous help, Austin', I said, with a little shade of blush on my cheeks.
'Y-You're welcome', he said, while blushing with hundred of shades.
I could feel Zack's eyes on me. Hah, he can miss me as much as he can, I'm not taking him back.

Chapter 13

Next morning at school I saw Austin leaning againest a wall, listening to his mp3 player. He noticed me and waved me over. As I approached him he took his right earphone out and smiled. His teeth were pearly white. So perfect.
'Hey Claudia.'
'You remembered my name?' I teased him. Austin laughed.
'Yeah,' he stuck his tongue out at me, making him look real ctue. 'Hopefully you still remember my name.'
'In fact I do so ha!' it was my turn to stick my tongue out. Austin laughed.
'Aww you look so cute when you do that,' he complimented. I blushed. 'Anyway any more problems I can listen to?' and that was how I started telling him about Callum crying and dad slapping me. He listened all through, like last time. Austin didn't even flinch at any of th things I said. I felt like an open book and damn did it feel good. I wished I could stay forever with him, just talking about random things but the bell rang. Time for classes.

Mum came into my bedroom. She sat down. I looked up at her, she looked better than yesterday morning. She had that look that meant she had something serious to talk to me about. Like when she talked about sex to me for the first time. And puberty. And periods.
'Claudia, I've got something to tell you,' she breathed in deep, 'I'm moving out. I've got boyfriend called Alexander. He's got a daughter, a year younger than you called Cindy. Hopefully after the divorce you'll be able to share with her and live with us.' I rarely heard what she said. It all came out as one sentence. I stopped listening. I couldn't believe she's got a boyfriend. She carried on talking but I didn't hear a sound.
I had gone all numb.
'B-b-but why did you and dad marry each other if you didn't love each other? Now me and Callum are going to be scarred for life!' I asked her. She looked at me and sighed.
'Me and your dad.. Well I had this sort of one night stand with him. He was a friend of mine and we had it, you know what I mean. The condom cracked and we didn't know. Weeks after I found out I was pregnant and we wanted what was best for you. So we got married so you'd have a wonderful life. But we di-' I cut her off.
'But my life hasn't turned out lovely has it? It's all broken now because of both of you. You don't know how much it hurts to see your parents break up!' I shouted. By now tears were streming down my face. They just kept on coming.
'You.. You don't know my life. You don't know my problems. You don't know me mum. And don't give me the stupid "it'll be alright" cos this family is never going to be alright again!' I got up and stared out the window. I didn't have enough courage to look at her face. She came up to me and tried to hug me, I pushed her away. A few minutes later, the door was closed.

I turned around, fell to the floor and sobbed my heart out.

Chapter 12

A masive hand slapped my cheek, which was blushing from thinking of Austin. I couldn't manage to say anything. Pain ran through all my body. Suddenly I was very scared. I prayed dad wouldn't beat me like he did with mum.
'How could you, young lady?' he screamed at me.
'W-wha-what did I do?' my voice sounded as if I was going to cry.
'You failed the history test! You're making me and your mum ashamed of you! We're not doing anything bad to you! We feed you and spend money on you. And this is our recompense? Bad marks?' his cold voice yelled at me.

I wanted to tell him how bad I was feeling. If it was after me, I wouldn't eat a month if they'd get back together and be a happy family. I would work and get a job if that would resolve the family problems. But I shut my mouth. I knew it wouldn't help at all.
I kept my tears for tonight. I could feel another fight was going to happen.
When I went up the stairs, I herd a crying noise from my brothers room.

'Why are you crying, Callum?' I asked him, while wipping a tear from his cheek.
'Y-you pro-promised', he said, with a breaking voice.
My world went down again. I broke my promise.
I couldn't do anything about it.Oh, I wished I could..
'S-sorry...' , it was all I could say.
'Dad told me he and mom are divorcing' he said. I could feel the saddness in his voice.
'I..I..' , I didn't know what to say.
'It'll be alright, Callum. You don't have to worry about it. ' , I lied again. Why did I have to say that?
I went in my room and jumped in my bed. I wanted to cry.

I did.

Questions were floating in my mind again.
They were all staring with 'why'.
Why can't my mum and dad get along?
Why can't my dad stop being so violent?
Why can't they do this for me and Callum?
Why can't we be a happy family?

Chapter 11

I got lost in a pair of deep green eyes. The world just disappeared. All my problems, gone in a vanish. In a click of a finger... Amazing...

'S-s-sorry,' I blubbled, stuttering. I recognized the face as the boy I was eyeing the other day. The brown haired one.
'Huh? Oh.. er.. It's ok. Why are you crying?' he asked, narrowing his eyes. I shook my head. He got the idea.
'Alright, my name's Austin. What's your?' he smiled at me. I tried looking for a tissue from my pocket. He handed me one and I wiped my eyes then blew my nose.
'C-' I coughed,'Claudia.' His face lit up.
'Your Zack's girlfriend right?'
'Uhm.. Not anymore. Why, how do you know him?' Austin's face drooped again.
'Oh. Well he's a friend of mine, not that close but still a friend. Dya want to talk about your problems?' he asked kindly. I thought about it for a minute and nodded.
'Could we go outside? I need fresh air,' I explained.

Soon as we went outside, I told him all about my problems and friends. How dad beat mum. How my friends don't spend time with me anymore. How Zack cheated on me. All the time he nodded and generally understood me.
'Sounds like your life sucks.'
'Pretty much, yeah.'
'Well it'll get better soon. Trust me.'
'Hah, I told my brother that and it got worse. Sometimes I think why don't I just die.' He looked shocked.
'No, don't say tha. Though life really is hard, you should treasure it cause you only get one chance.' I looked at him. Austin sounded serious about that, really open minded he was. I admired that.

By the time we went through all my problens, lunch was over. We said goodbye and I thanked him.
'No problem. Any time you need someone to talk to or just to hang around with, come with me. I don't bite,' he winked and all my insides turned upside down. I smiled at him and he walked away, waving at me. I waved back and sighed. Wow, life just got better. When I walked into science I had a grin on my face. All I could think of was Austin. How magical his voice was. How different he was than others. How understandable. I wish I could say the same for my friends.

But my happiness was not to stay for long. I stepped inside my house and took of my shoes. I went into the living room and SLAP!

Chapter 10

It was breaking me in pieces.
How could they? How could they possibly do such a thing? They didn't knew what damage they've done. They would destory my happiness and my borther's childhood. Now what?
I didn't say anything to her. I climbed up to my bed and closed my eyes. I hoped it was just a dream that would end as soon as I would wake up.
I woke up and went straight to the kitchen.

Nothing changed.
My mum was cooking, looking down and my dad was reading a newspaper. Callum was standing silently on a chair, reading something for school.
I sighed. Last night wasn't a dream.
My dad got up and took his brief case. He pushed me away with anger and slammed the door.
My mum turned around. I saw bruises on her face. She looked at me with sober eyes and told me a simply: 'Good morning, hunny.'
It was too much to bare. Everything around me was breaking. I could see even in Callum's eyes some hidden sadness. Poor innocent child.
I took a shower, washed my face and brushed my teeth. I looked in the mirror.
I looked miserable. How could anyone look at me like that? Now I knew why Zack cheated on me. He tought I was ugly. And the other girl was beautiful. I wated to scream, to make the sorrows go away. But I couldn't.

I didn't take breakfast. I wasn't hungry. I grabbed a pare of jeans and a red t-shirt, then took my bag and went straight to school. On my way I saw Emily, Brenda and Izzy with their boyfriends. Ugh. They waved at me and I waved back. Tho I didn't want to. I wanted to turn around and enter the classroom.
I sat at my place and entered my world.

'Me and your dad..we're going to divorce.'

What was going to happen next? Where was I going to live? Am I going to be separated from Callum? Is dad going to change? Lots of quesions were flying in my head, making me wonder if my life will ever get better.
The geography and english classes passed quickly. I wasn't paying attention at what my teacher was babling about anyway.
At luch time, I set at a table with my friends and their boyfriends. They were talking about the date they had last night.

Last night.
They were having fun while I was trembling of fear.
A silent akward moment came. I started to cry. Tears were falling like they waited this moment for such a long time. I stood up and ran on the corridor.
Suddenly, I bumped into some one. I looked up to see who it was...

Chapter 9

I heard that they decided to have their date today. After school. Nobody asked anything about me. What happened to friends sticking by each other? The oath we solely swore each other? This could not be the same friendship we had 5 years ago, could it?

Mum said she had to go get milk for breakfast the following morning. Yet it took her 3 hours to come back. Today was different. Dad came back sober.
Dinner was awkward, no one spoke. Frequently, I glanced at Callum and saw him looking from mum to dad worriedly.
'Callum, could you please tell your dad to pass me the salt please?' mum asked. He opened his mouth to tell dad but dad put stopped him by putting his hand up.
'No, why not ask me yourself Claire?' dad said, with a pinch of anger in his voice. She didn't say anything, just moved her food around the plate. Dad stared at her wth piercing eyes, nose flared and face red. Suddenly, he pushed his plate away and stood up.
'What's the matter huh Claire? Why aren't you talking to me?' he started raising his voice.
'You know what's wrong Wilson,' mum answered quietly.
'I said sorry for tha. Isn't that enough? Eh? Isn't that enough? You go flouncing around town, leaving Claudia and Callum along. But I don't say anything. Do I do anything about it? Nothing,' he shouted. Nobody said or did anything. But this time dad was jabbing mum in her arm withhis finer.
'Got nothing to say all of a sudden?' he pulled her hair. I saw her flinch in pain. I abruptly stood up. Callum understood and went to his bedroom.
I stayed on the stairs listening.

He did it again.
He shouted at her again.
He beat her again. Why didn't mum do anything about it? By 10, dad stopped beating her. For some time there was silence.
I heard his soft 'sorry'. But sorry isn't enough surely? She can't take him back now. Not when he's beaten her. I heard them discussing something, then theirvoices raised. He didn't beat her again. Somebody opened the door, I went swiftly up the stairs and into bed. There was a knock on the door.

'Claudia?' someone called out. It was my little brother. He scuttled in and sad on my bed beside me.
'Claudia, nothing is gonna happen is it? They're going to be alright, right? We're going to be a happy right?' he asked, scared. I nodded and hugged him tightly.
'Everything's going to be alright Callum. Don't worry, before you know it we'll be back to normal,' I smiled at him. What a big fat lie. Nothing is going to be normal with this family.
'Promise?' I nodded again.
'I promise,' I regretted saying that. I know I'll break his promise sooner or later. I told him to go back to bed and he obeyed.

Just as I closed my eyes, someone else knocked. I sighed.
'Claudia?' It was mum this time. She came in with bloodshot eyes. I got up and hugged her.
'Look darling, I want you to be the first one to know. You must'nt tell Callum. Or anybody else in fact, everyone now a days want fresh gossip..' she told me. She looked into my eyes,'.. Me and your dad.. We're going to divorce.'

That was that. My whole world came crashing down. Everything that once made me happy didn't anymore. How could this happen?

Chapter 8

So, yea. I was stuck ... Next question:

' What's the name of Henry the VIII's first wife?'

Wife, huh... Marriage. It reminded me of my mum and dad again. The horrible night my mum endures and the terrible behaviour my dad takes.
I turned back to reality. I just couldn't remember her name. I skipped this question too, hoping that I would concentrate more at the next tasks.
I was wrong.
Everything gravitated through my problems. Great, now I was going to get a bad mark at what I was the best at school too. Oh, how wonderful.
After the horrible test ended, I ran to my friends to tell them about my problems. I was sure they'd understand.
Or would they?
I wanted to give it a try. Their boyfriends didn't change them that much, right?

'Hey girls', I smiled shyly, like it was the first time I talked to them.
'Oh, hey Claudia. We were just planning a double date, well actually a triple date. Izzy just told us that Justin asked her out' , said Brenda, full of joy.
'Wow, that's great news', I lied.
I felt my voice cracking like something inside me broke.
I was really furious now. I was the only one left without a boyfriend.
'So, what have you been up to?', asked Emily, with a smile shining on her face.
'Actually, I am pretty sad. My parents got in a really serious fight last night. As if that wasn't enough, I thing I will fail at the history test. I couldn't concentrate enough. And me and Zack breaking up...'
'Oh, c'mon! Don't be so emo about it! It happens to everyone once in a life time,' said Izzy.
'Yeah, this shouldn't make you feel upset; it could be worse,' said Emily.
'I... I think you're right, ' I lied. It didn't feel any better. I guess I was waiting for too much emotional support.
They didn't understand me.
I was wrong bout my friends. Maybe I was too optimistic.

So... what am I going to do now?...

Sunday, 12 April 2009

Chapter 7

My alarm went off, waking me up. I thought what I went through yesterday was just a dream. That is, til I saw mum. You could easily see she had been crying. Eye red, face swollen and her hair all over the place. I've never seen her like this. Usually my mum was the organised one, really hard to knock down. Yet right now she didn't look that strong at all.
Callum sense there was somethng wrong but he didn't say anything about it. We heard someone race down the stairs. Dad.
'Shit! I'm late for work!'
No sorries to mum, no good morning to me or Callum. Nothing.
We both followed what dad did except for mum who was making him toast. Why was she making him toast when he beat her last night? Was she crazy? Dad made himself tea. When his toast was ready he grabbed it from mum and ran out the door. I was shocked. Why didn't he say goodbye?
I could tell Callum thought the same. Mum shrugged.
'Kids, you both better get to school.' We didn't say anything. Callum got his bag, so did I. When I closed the door I heard a loud choked sob.

As I walked through the school gates, I saw all my best friends with the 'cool' guys. Well them guys were their boyfriends now. I saw Izzy flirting with guy. That was probably her crush. I studied him for a moment. I recognized him as Justin. Hmm... She could have done a lot better. I geuss love is blind. Anyways, Emily waved me over but I shook my head. I didn't want to be the odd one out. Sh smiled at me, turned to Chris and laughed at something he said. Just as I was going inside school, out of the corner of my eye I saw Justin kiss Izzy on the cheek. I'm the only single one left.

The world falls in love when I'm lonely. Oh how ironic.


First period, history. Mr Darcy announced a surprise test. More like barked. We all groaned. Whilst Darcy gave out the test paper, I got a pen out my bag. When I looked up, Zack was staring at me sadly. I smirked. Missing me already huh? Tough luck.
The test began and I got stuck right on the first question. Honestly, I'm good at history. Ok call me boring but yeah. And I got stuck on the first one. It's not my fault. I couldn't concentrate.
'Who won the battle of the christians and the protestants in the 17th century?'
Battled. Reminds me of mum and dad last night.
Her screams.
His slaps.
Her protests begging him to stop.
Him punching harder and shouting at her to shut the hell up.
And you know what's harder? My friends don't care about me. Well I don't care about them. Them and their poxy boyfriends. Who needs a guy to get through life anyway? I don't.

Chapter 6

I went to bed, still frightened. I tried to sleep but I couldn't. The image of my dad beating my mum was stuck in my head. Why, why did they get married if they don't love each other? Now they're stuck with me and my little brother.
I wish I was never born. At least I wouldn't live this nightmare.
Tears started to fall down on my cheeks as I fell asleep. Hours later, I woke up. Mm.... I got thirsty.. I went down the stairs in the kitchen to grab a glass of water.
Mom was sitting on a chair, crying.
'Mom, what happened?' I asked her, even though I knew the answer. I hoped I'd comfort her a bit.
'Nothing, sweety. I'm alright', she said, while tears of sorrow came. She smiled weakly, to look like nothing happened.
I wasn't thirsty anymore. The sadness took it away. I drank some water anyway, to have a motivation why I woke up. I saw dad in the living room. He was watching TV with a beer in his hand. It made me feel guilty, even tho I wasn't.
Mum wiped out the tears and took my hand. She took me to bed and kissed me goodnight.

Yeah, my life is wonderful.

Chapter 5

That day I came home, my mum was preparing dinner for us whilst my younger brother was in his room.

'Claudia? Are you back darling?' she called from the kitchen.
'Yes mum,' I replied, stopping in my tracks as I was going upstairs.
'Sweetie, I have to go out now. Your brother has eaten and so have I. Your dinner's on the table, when you dad gets back could you please warm his dinner up for him and give it to him? It's in the oven,' mum explained. I nodded.
'Alright, but where are you going?' I asked.
'Er, your Aunty Ethel is ill so I have to make dinner for your cousins,' she said.
'Okie dokie. Love you mum,' I said. She kissed me on the cheek.
'Love you too Claudia, make sure Callum goes to bed on time!' mum said as she went out the door.

It was an hour later that my dad came home. Late and also drunk. As usual. Not surprising really as he's been overdosing on alcohol since he doesn't have enough money to pay the bills. He shouted for me to get his dinner so I warmed it up and gave it to him. No thank you's. After he had eaten, he fell asleep. I put Callum to sleep and stayed up in my bedroom. Mum cam home at 11. Funny, I never knew making dinner would take so long. My dad pounced on mum as soon as she came through the door. He started shouting at her. Saying why did she leave us by ourselves.
'You was gonna be home soon anyway! And their Aunty Ethel was ill so I had to make dinner for her poor children!' she shouted at him.
'What about her husband huh?'
'You know he has to work to keep up with the mortgages and their bills. Unlike you, he looks after his family!' that was it. Dad slapped her. And once you start dad off, he just keeps going. I head him punch her, pull her hair, hit her with the metal stick in our living room. All I could hear is her screams and shouts. I wanted to go downstairs and stop him. I wanted him to leave. Instead I sat down, curled into a ball. I rocked forward and back. I whispered to myself it was going to be alright. But I knew for a fact it wasn't going to. Nothing ever will.

Saturday, 11 April 2009

Chapter 4

Next morning, when I woke up I realised that I was going to have to face Zack at school. Knowing him, he probably had another girl wrapped around his finger. As I walked over to Emily's house I thought how weird it would be if all my bff's found a guy and I was the one without one.

'Bye mum! Oh hi Claudia!' Emily called out.
'Hey..' I said, Then Emily started talking about Chris again. Instead I started thinking how my next guy I'm going to have is going to be. Not like Zack. Obviously. Brown hair. Green eyes. Has a good sense of humour. Really does understand me. As I thought of more, I spotted a guy in our school uniform walking to school on the other sid of the street. Hmm.. I never saw him before. Probably new. Tres hot though. Brown messy hair with blonde highlights. Great. He turned around to check if there were any cars around and crossed the road. I saw a flash of his green eyes. Ohhh so perfect. At that moment, we came up to Brenda and Izzy.

'Hey Claudia, in your own world eh?' Izzy smiled.
'Yeah,' I smiled back at her, 'Yoy been up to much this weekend?'
'Not really,' Izzy said, then made a sad face, 'I've got no life,' she laughed.
'Claudia's dumped Zack. The stupid jerk has cheated on her,' Emily explained. Brenda and Izzy gasped.
'Why didn't you tell me when I called you?' Brenda asked. I shrugged.
'Didn want to make you sad I geuss,' I said. She hugged me.
'Aww, Zack doesn't know what he's missing!' Brenda gushed.

Izzy linked arms with me and we walked to class whilst we left the other two talking about their love life. Well you know what? My love life is lame.
But then as we were walking down the corridor, Zack entered with a girl. His arm was wrapped around her waist. He walked past us and whispered something to the girl which made her smirk. Wow, Zack can be so predictable.
'So I geuss we're the only single one left out us bffs huh?' Izzy supposed. I nodded.
'Sadly. Have you your eye on anybody?' I asked.
'Maybe..' she smiled shyly. So I geuss you'll get him in no time then.

Can anything get any worse? Little did I known that I had a hell lot of problems that I was going to have to face..

Chapter 3

I heard a short intake of breath.
'Oh my Jackwardse! I knew he was a jerk from the start... Are you alright Claudia?' Emily pretty much screamed.
'Yeah, I'm fine. Listen, can I come over to yours now?' I asked.
'Sure!' and that was that. I went over to Emily's house.

'And then right after that, he kissed me. He really is good at kissing! I swear I felt as if I was melting.. Right, so we were kissing for like 10 minutes and when we stopped, he asked me out. Obviously I said yes. I mean c'mon, I've been in love with him as soon as I set eyes on him!' Emily exclaimed. I was over at her house and for the last hour she had been talking about her new boyfriend, Chris, non-stop. Was I like her when I was with Zack? I wondered if I should ask her but I kept on thinking. Alright, maybe she is getting annoying. Honestly, can anyone get some sympathy around here? I have been cheated on you know. But no.

I smiled and nodded. 'Your lucky, I'm happy for you.'
'Thanks! Do you know what he said about me? It was so sw-' and right at that moment my ringtone came into action.
'If you say jump, I'd ask how high, I geuss I'm just mad in love with you.' I made a quick self note to change my ringtone. The caller name flashed. It was Brenda, another best friend of mine. Thank god, I can escape from Emily ranting on about Chris.
'Hey Brenda, sup?' I said whilst Emily was still talking, apparantly not noticing I was on the phone.
'Claudia, you won't geuss what! I met this really hot guy in my mum's yoga class. And after the class was over, he asked me if I wanted to have a drink, then afterwards we swapped numbers. But then we stood there awkwardly then he lent over and kissed me! I mean he kissed mee. The freak that can't get with nobody. I got kissed! And by a hot guy as well..' she gabbled through the phone. Oh great. Oh bloody great. Another one that's going to talk forever about her guy.
'Wow Brenda! Good for you girl!' I tried faking to be happy for her but I think I failed.
'Yeah I gotta go now, I'll tell you the rest at school tomorrow,' and she hung up, not noticing that I sounded sarcastic. I looked up, Emily was staring at me.
'What?' I asked.
'Who was it?' she asked.
'Oh, it was Brenda. She's got a sort-of guy,' I replied.
'Oh my Jackwardse! Do you think we could like have a double date? That would be totally awesome!' she fantasized.

Mhm.. Seems like the world gets all lovey dovey when I'm not..

Chapter 2

As I walked towards the bench, I saw Zack staring at another girl. I sighed. I hate love and I hate boys. After I do this, I am going to turn into a nun. Then I'd never get hurt again.

When I got behind Zack, I coughed. He turned around, smile and gave me a warm hug. But it didn't feel like it. As he did that, I caught the smell of his cologne. I used to love that scent. But now it reeks.
'So what's the matter Claudia?' Zack asked, letting go of me, 'Why did you want to meet up?' I looked into his eyes and there I saw it. In his eyes, I did not see my reflection yet another girl's. That was when summoned the courage and told him.
'It's over,' I said. And with that I sighed a huge relief. Did it feel so good or what! Next thing I did was turn around and walk away. Well that was what I was planning to do but Zack caught my hand.

'No way are you leaving without telling me why you are breaking up with me,' I could feel the anger in his voice. Why is he angry? It's me that has been cheated on.
'I don't think I should tell you as you should already know,' I replied. Zack blankly stared at me. Ok I couldn't help it but laugh. Laugh all the pain away, laugh all the anger away and mostly laugh at his stupidity.
'How idiotic do you think I am Zack? Don't you know I'd find out you were cheating on me sooner or later?' I growled at him. 'Didn't,' I paused,' you think that what you did would affect me this way? Didn't you stop and think about your girlfriend, me, for a minute?' Zack dropped my hand. At that moment he opened his mouth and closed it again. I took it as a chance to escape from him. I looked at him once more with a look of disgust and walked away.

When I got home I called Emily up. My best friend ever. I could always trust her to be there for me and help me get through huge problems. I waited impatiently for her to pick up. 'Come on... Come on...'
'Hi Claudia! I was about to call you to tell you something,' her cheerful voice echoed through my mobile.
'Emily... I've broken up with Zack.'

Chapter 1

I was shocked. Wait not shocked, traumatized. So I've heard about people cheating and being cheated on, but never had I thought for a second that I would be a victim. Maybe he sent it to the wrong person? No, he couldn't have. He'd sent millions before. Maybe it was his ex girlfriend and he still has the email from before? Can not be true at all. The date and time says he sent it at 9:53pm on 24th March. Last night.

So this is probably why he says he has to go all of a sudden. This is why he never stays with me for more than 15 minutes. I shook my head in disgust. I should have known. Suddenly right there and then, I started crying. Let's get this straight - I'm not the type to cry a lot. Not at all. My family was known to be strong and shit. But this got to me, really deep. I started howling like mad, as if a car had ran over my leg. And once I started crying, boy I couldn't stop. My mascara ran all down my cheeks, staining my snow white skin. God, my make up was ruined. I had never in my life felt so worthless. Who did Zack think I was? I'd show him.

I dried my tears and got my mobile. As I scrolled down my contact list, I thought of when I would say.
"How dare you cheat on me?" Hmm... no. That sounds a bit stupid. I found his number and pressed call. It started ringing.
"It's over!" Not that either. I've heard and read that it's not a good idea to dump someone on the phone or online. Before I could think of anything else, he picked up.
'Hey Claudia,' Zack said. Whenever he spoke, my knees turned numb. So how is it that I do not feel that way now?
‘Uhm.. Hi,’ I replied.
‘Is there something wrong babe?,’ he asked. Nothing really, just the fact that I found out that your a lying cheating bastard, which I really wanted to say but I didn’t.
‘Nahh,’ I said instead. Damn I should have told him the truth.
‘So why did you call?’ he asked. There was silence whilst I was trying to think what to say to him. ‘Claudia, you there?’
‘Yeah I am.. Zack could you meet me at the Park please? Usual bench,’ I finally came up with.
‘Oh ok, anything wrong?’
‘Just meet me there in 15 minutes,’ I replied.
‘Alright, I love you,’ he said. He hung up before I could say anything else.
‘Too bad I don’t,’ and I washed my face then got ready.


I had everything a girl wanted, perfect hair; perfect nose; perfect size; perfect boyfriend and a perfect loving home.
Often, I hear girls whispering about me. Well bitching about me.
'That Claudia... She thinks she soo perfect, you know? I mean just because her boyfriend is like one of the most liked guys in our year, she thinks shes all it..'
'Claudia? That slut? Pfft she thinks shes just perfect.'
'Haha I know! When she realises how she's not perfect, she'll totally beg people to hang out with her. You know, I think Zack's cheating on her.'
Well I never listened to them. Thought they were jealous. Oh how wrong I was. Little did I know my world was going to crash into small pieces sooner or later..

* * * * * * * * * * * *

"I really love you too. I'll miss you like hell when you go abroad :' Goodnight babe - sweet dreams!

Love you lots more,
from Zack

I gasped. How could this be? I checked when it was sent. 24th March - 9:53pm. My eyes felt as if they were being pricked with a pin. I couldn't believe her eyes.

My boyfriend was cheating on her.